Consent 
and 
Healthy 
Sexuality 
for 
People 
with 
Disabilities 
August 
21, 
2018 
2:00 
p.m. 
EDT  


>> 
ASHLEY 
BROMPTON: 
Good 
afternoon, 
everyone. 
This 
is 
Ashley 
Brompton 
with 
the 
Vera 
Institute 
of 
Justice. 
This 
webinar 
will 
begin 
in 
five 
minutes. 
If 
you 
have 
a 
question 
or 
you 
need 
any 
assistance, 
please 
send 
us 
a 
message 
in 
the 
question 
& 
answer 
pod 
below 
the 
ASL 
interpreter. 
If 
you 
would 
like 
to 
download 
a 
copy 
of 
the 
PowerPoint 
you 
may 
do 
so 
by 
clicking 
on 
the 
download 
presentation 
pod, 
clicking 
on 
the 
file 
and 
clicking 
download 
file. 
Again, 
the 
webinar 
will 
be 
starting 
in 
just 
about 
in 
five 
minutes. 
Thank 
you. 


>> 
ASHLEY 
BROMPTON: 
As 
a 
reminder 
the 
webinar 
will 
be 
beginning 
at 


2:00 
p.m. 
Eastern 
time. 
>> 
ASHLEY 
BROMPTON: 
Good 
afternoon 
everyone, 
thank 
you 
for 
joining 
our 
webinar 
today. 
This 
is 
Ashley 
Brompton 
with 
the 
Vera 
Institute 
of 
Justice. 
The 
webinar 
will 
begin 
in 
5 
minutes. 
If 
joining 
our 
webinar 
today. 
I'm 
Ashley 
Brompton 
with 
the 
Center for Victimization 
and 
Safety 
at 
the 
Vera 
Institute 
of 
Justice. 
I 
would 
like 
to 
welcome 
you 
to 
today's 
webinar 
where 
we 
will 
be 
discussing 
consent 
and 
healthy 
sexuality 
for 
people 
with 
disabilities. 
We 
are 
pleased 
to 
bring 
you 
this 
as 
part of our 2018 
End 
Abuse 
of People 
with 
Disabilities 
webinar 
series. 
We 
are 
just 
waiting 
for 
one 
moment 
while 
we 
clear 
up 
a 
captioning 
issue. 
We 
will 
be 
restarting 
momentarily. 
Thank 
you 
so 
much 
for 
your 
patience. 
As 
a 
reminder, 
if 
you 
have 
called 
into 
this 
webinar 
today, 
please 



make 
sure 
your 
line 
is 
muted. 
Thank 
you 
so 
much. 
Again, 
we 
will 
be 
starting 


momentarily. 
Let's 
go 
ahead 
and 
get 
started. 


We 
have 
just 
a 
few 
quick 
logistical 
items 
to 
go 
over 
before 
we 
begin 
today. 


We'd 
like 
your 
assistance 
in 
testing 
the 
captioning 
pod. 
The 
captioning 
pod 
is 
located 
in 
the 
bottom 
left hand 
corner of your screen 
directly below 
the 
Presentation. 
The 
words 
I 
am 
speaking 
should 
appear 
in 
the 
captioning 
pod. 
If 
you 
CAN 
see 
the 
captioning, 
please 
go 
ahead 
and 
raise 
your 
virtual 
hand 
using 
the 
virtual 
person 
at 
the 
top 
of 
your 
screen. 
Okay, 
great, 
if 
there 
As 
a 
reminder, 
this 
feature 
is 
not 
supported 
by 
the 
Adobe 
Connect 
application. 


is 
anyone 
that CAN 
NOT 
see 
the 
captioning, 
please 
send 
us 
a 
message 
in 
the 
Q&A 
pod. 


Next, 
in 
the 
pod 
to 
the 
right 
of 
the 
presentation 
you 
should 
see 
our 
American 
Sign 
Language 
interpreter. 
How 
is 
the 
light? 
Can 
you 
clearly 
see 
the 
interpreters? 
If you 
can 
clearly see 
the 
interpreters 
and 
the 
lighting 
is 
good, 
please 
raise 
your virtual hand. If you 
can't clearly see 
them 
or the 
lighting 
is 
too 
dim 
to 
see, 
please 
use 
the 
Q&A 
pod 
to 
contact 
us. 
I 
will 
now 
pause 
for 
a 
moment 
to 
see 
if 
anyone 
needs 
assistance 
and 
to 
allow 
time 
for 
our 
interpreters 
to 
make 
those 
adjustments. 


Participants 
are 
in 
"listen-only" 
mode, 
which 
means 
we 
are 
not 
able 
to 
hear 
you, 
but 
you 
should 
be 
able 
to 
hear 
us. 
If 
you 
cannot 
hear 
the 
presenters 
speaking, 
if 
you 
are 
having 
any 
difficulties 
with 
the 
captioning, 
or 
any 
other 
technical 
difficulties 
during 
the 
presentation, 
please 
enter a 
message 
in 
the 
Question 
pod, 
to 
the 
right 
of 
the 
PowerPoint. 
This 
is 
the 
best 
way 
to 
communicate 
with 
me 
or 
my 
Vera 
colleagues 
who 
are 
providing 
technical 
support 
throughout 
the 
webinar 
today. 


We 
plan 
to 
have 
time 
after the 
presentation 
for questions 
and 
comments. If 
you 
don't 
want 
to 
lose 
a 
question 
or 
comment 
during 
the 
presentation, 
please 
feel 
free 
to 
go 
ahead 
and 
enter 
it 
in 
the 
Q&A 
pod 
and 
we 
will 
hold 
onto 
your 
questions 
until 
the 
end. 
We 
are 
going 
to 
pause 
for 
just 
a 
brief 
moment. 
It 
seems 
as 
though 
our 
interpreter 
is 
a 
little 
bit 
blurry 
for 
some 
folks. 
So 
I 
want 
to 
pause 
for 
just 
a 
moment 
so 
that 
he 
can 
make 
sure 
to 
adjust 
his 
settings. 
It 
looks 
like 
we 
have 
worked 
on 
that. 
Again, 
as 
a 
reminder, 
if 
you 
have 
a 
technical 
difficulty 
or 
a 
question 
for 
our 
technical 
team, 
please 
post 
that 
in 
the 
question 
and 
answer 
pod 
rather than 
the 
chat pod 
so 
that we 
can 
keep 
that out of 
--behind 
the 
scenes. 
If 
you 
have 
any 
issues 
with 
the 
interpreter 
or 
the 
captioner, 
please 
go 
ahead 
and 
post 
in 
the 
Q&A 
pod, 
the 
question 
and 
answer 
pod. 
We 
plan 
to 
have 
time 
after 



the 
presentation 
for 
questions 
and 
comments. 
If 
you 
don't 
want 
to 
lose 
a 
question 
or 
comment, 
feel 
free 
to 
enter 
it 
into 
the 
chat 
pod. 


If 
you 
would 
like 
to 
download 
a 
copy 
of 
today's 
presentation, you 
can 
do 
so 
by 
going 
to 
the 
pod 
in 
the 
lower 
right 
hand 
corner 
next 
to 
the 
Power 
Point. 
Select 
the 
document 
and 
click 
the 
Download 
File 
button. 


We 
are 
going 
to 
pause 
for 
just 
another 
second. 
We 
want 
to 
ensure 
as 
much 
access 
as 
possible. 
We 
want 
to 
make 
sure 
the 
interpreter 
and 
the 
captioner 
are 
working 
correctly 
for 
everyone. 
So 
if 
you 
will 
give 
us 
one 
moment 
while 
we 
make 
sure 
that 
is 
working 
for 
folks. 


>> 
This 
is 
Sandra 
with 
Vera. 
I 
just 
want 
to 
point 
out 
that 
we 
are 
moving 
the 
pods 
around 
a 
little 
bit 
based 
on 
a 
participant 
request 
to 
move 
the 
captioning 
pod. 
So 
you 
won't 
hear 
any 
audio 
at 
this 
time. 
The 
audio 
has 
not 
gone 
out. 
I 
just 
want 
to 
be 
clear 
about 
that. 


>> 
ASHLEY 
BROMPTON: 
We 
just 
want 
to 
make 
sure 
for 
the 
participant 
that 
requested 
the 
change 
in 
the 
pod, 
does 
this 
work 
for you? 
If you 
could 
let us 
know 
in 
the 
question 
and 
answer pod, 
that would 
be 
great. Thank you 
so 
much. 


Let's 
go 
ahead 
and 
continue 
now. 
We 
apologize 
again. 
We 
try 
to 
make 
our 
webinars 
as 
accessible 
for 
everyone 
as 
possible. 
So 
sometimes 
we're 
moving 
things 
around. 
We 
thank 
you 
for 
your 
patience 
and 
we 
hope 
you 
enjoy 
the 
webinar. 
Let's 
go 
ahead 
and 
begin. 


People 
with 
disabilities, 
particularly 
developmental 
disabilities, 
are 
more 
likely to 
experience 
sexual violence 
than 
people 
without disabilities. 
Unfortunately, 
people 
with 
developmental 
disabilities 
are 
also 
less 
likely 
to 
receive 
information 
about healthy 
sexuality 
and 
how 
to 
identify 
violence 
in 
their 
sexual 
encounters. 
This 
lack 
of 
information 
contributes 
to 
a 
lack 
of 
safety 
and 
autonomy. 
Sexual 
self-advocacy 
ensures 
that 
people 
with 
developmental 
disabilities 
understand 
safe 
and 
healthy 
sexual 
relationships 
and 
the 
issues 
associated 
with 
safe 
relationships, 
particularly 
consent. 
To 
speak 
about 
these 
issues, 
we 
are 
pleased 
to 
welcome 
Katherine 
McLaughlin. 


Katherine 
McLaughlin, 
M.Ed. 
is 
a 
national 
expert 
and 
trains 
individuals, 
staff, 
and 
parents 
on 
sexuality 
and 
developmental 
disabilities. 
She 
teaches 
sexuality 
education 
to 
people 
with 
DD/ID 
as 
well 
as 
trains 
them 
to 
be 
peer 
sexuality 
educators 
themselves. 
Katherine 
is 
the 
author 
of 
an 
agency 
and 
school 
curriculum: 
Sexuality 
Education 
for 
People 
with 
Developmental 
Disabilities, 
and 
has 
developed 
two 
online 
courses; 
one 
to 
train 
professionals, 
Developmental 
Disability 
and 
Sexuality 
101, 
and 
one 
for 
parents: 
Talking 
to 
Your 
Kids: 
Developmental 
Disabilities 
and 
Sexuality. 



Thank 
you 
for 
being 
with 
us 
today 
and 
I 
will 
now 
turn 
the 
presentation 
over 
to 
you, 
Katherine. 


>> 
KATHERINE 
McLAUGHLIN: 
Some 
up 
with 
give 
me 
a 
thumbs 
up. 


>> 
ASHLEY 
BROMPTON: 
We 
can 
hear 
you. 


>> 
KATHERINE 
McLAUGHLIN: 
Good. 
Thank 
you. 
Well, 
great 
to 
be 
here 
with 
everyone, 
and 
as 
Ashley 
said, 
I 
have 
been 
an 
educator 
and 
trainer 
for 
over 
25 
years, 
and 
my 
work 
started 
off 
at 
planned 
parenthood 
in 
northern 
New 
England, 
and 
have 
moved 
into 
creating 
my 
own 
business, 
and 
my 
business 
name 
is 
Elevatus 
Training, 
and 
my 
business 
is 
to 
elevate 
the 
status 
of 
all 
people 
so 
that 
we 
view 
people 
with 
disabilities 
as 
sexual 
beings, 
just 
like 
everyone 
else. 
So 
that's 
the 
name, 
is 
Elevatus 
Training, 
because 
of 
elevating 
the 
status. 


So 
my 
work 
at 
planned 
parenthood, 
I 
started 
to 
get 
requests 
from 
special 
educators, 
and 
like 
Ashley 
mentioned, 
most 
of 
my 
work 
has 
been 
around 
developmental 
disabilities. 


So 
I 
started 
to 
get 
requests 
on 
how 
do 
ideal 
with 
sexuality, 
and 
then 
I 
started 
to 
offer 
trainings 
and 
did 
a 
lot 
of 
work 
with 
ground 
mountain 
self-advocates 
in 
Vermont 
where 
we 
created 
this 
curriculum 
that 
Ashley 
mentioned. 
It's 
designed 
to 
be 
team 
by 
someone 
with 
a 
developmental 
disability 
and 
a 
professional 
and 
to 
use 
people 
with 
disabilities 
in 
the 
process 
of 
creating 
the 
curriculum 
as 
well. 


So 
we 
had 
these 
requests. 
I 
started 
working 
with 
green 
mountain 
self-advocates, 
and 
my 
focus 
is 
to 
help 
people 
with 
developmental 
disabilities, 
or 
all 
disabilities, 
lead 
sexually 
healthy 
lives, 
and 
how 
I 
do 
that 
and 
how 
I 
approach 
that 
is 
to 
help 
others 
become 
more 
comfortable 
and 
confident 
in 
addressing 
this 
topic. 
So 
then 
that 
will 
lead 
to 
people 
with 
disabilities 
having 
sexually 
healthy 
lives. 


So 
for 
the 
next 
hour 
or 
so, 
we're 
going 
to 
look 
at 
this 
idea 
of 
it's 
my 
prerogative, 
consent 
and 
healthy 
sexuality 
for 
people 
with 
disabilities. 
As 
Ashley 
said, 
in 
particular, 
people 
with 
developmental disabilities 
have 
a 
higher rate 
of 
sexual 
abuse. 
I'll 
give 
you 
some 
of 
those 
statistics. 
But 
also 
people 
with 
physical 
disabilities 
also 
have 
a 
higher 
rate 
of 
sexual 
abuse 
than 
someone 
without 
a 
disability. 


So 
for 
today, 
the 
learning 
objectives 
are 
we're 
going 
to 
review 
statistics 
on 
sexual 
violence 
against 
people 
with 
disabilities. 
This 
is 
primarily 
developmental 
disabilities. 
We're 
going 
to 
define 
the 
current 
messages 
and 
information 
people 
with 
disabilities 
receive 
about 
sexuality. 
So 
I 
will 
be 
asking 
you 
to 
chime 
in 
in 
the 
chat 
box 
about 
what 
are 
some 
of 
the 
messages. 
We're 
going 
to 
explore 
how 



these 
messages 
and 
information 
contribute 
to 
a 
lack 
of 
safety 
and 
self-autonomy. 
And 
we're 
going 
to 
discuss 
sexual 
self-advocacy 
as 
a 
way 
to 
increase 
safety 
and 
self-autonomy. 
And 
then 
we're 
also 
going 
to 
review 
the 
role 
consent 
plays 
in 
safe 
and 
autonomous 
sexual 
relationships. 
So 
those 
are 
the 
learning 
objectives, 
and 
we're 
going 
to 
move 
into 
people 
with 
disabilities 
and 
some 
of 
the 
statistics. 


So 
starting 
off 
with 
a 
lack 
of 
safety 
and 
autonomy. 
So 
when 
we 
--there 
was 
a 
recent 
study 
done 
by 
the 
national 
developmental 
disability 
council 
where 
they 
looked 
at sexual abuse 
and 
the 
rates 
of sexual abuse. So 
most of the 
statistics 
come 
that 
from 
study, 
and 
people 
with 
intellectual/developmental 
dill 
D 
disabilities 
are 
at 
a 
higher 
risk 
of 
being 
abused 
and 
you 
may 
have 
heard 
that 
and 
are 
quite 
aware 
of 
that. 
There 
has 
been 
different 
statistics 
thrown 
out 
there 
as 
far 
as 
the 
actual 
rate, 
but in 
general, 
people 
say 
they're 
2.5 
to 
10 
times 
more 
likely, 
and 
last, 
I believe 
it was 
January, 
national public radio, 
did 
a 
six-part 
series 
on 
sexual 
abuse 
and 
people 
with 
developmental 
disabilities, 
and 
the 
statistics 
that 
they 
came 
up 
with 
was 
seven 
times 
more 
likely. 
You 
may 
also 
--if you 
haven't 
heard 
that 
six-part 
series, 
it's 
quite 
amazing. 
I 
think 
it's 
called 
"the 
silent 
epidemic," 
and 
it's 
about 
people 
with 
developmental 
disabilities 
and 
sexual 
abuse. 
Really 
powerful. 


So 
another 
study 
is 
saying 
90% 
will experience 
abuse 
at some 
point in 
their 
lifetime, 
which 
is 
such 
a 
high, 
high 
rate. And 
15 
to 
19,000 
people 
with 
developmental 
disabilities 
are 
raped 
each 
year. 
In 
the 
U.S. 
So 
very 
high 
rates 
of 
sexual 
abuse. 


The 
other 
thing 
that 
this 
large 
national study found 
was 
that they're 
more 
likely to 
experience 
violence. So 
people 
with 
intellectual/developmental 
disabilities 
are 
more 
likely 
to 
experience 
repeated 
abuse. 
49% 
had 
experienced 
10 
or 
more 
incidents 
of 
abuse. 
People 
with 
developmental 
disabilities 
are 
more 
likely to 
be 
abused 
if they have 
profound 
disabilities 
and 
a 
higher level of support 
and 
dependent 
on 
services. 
So 
very 
vulnerable. 
And 
having 
personal 
care 
by 
someone 
else, 
and 
that 
increases 
their 
risk. 
And 
96% 
of 
cases 
that 
were 
perpetrated 
by 
someone 
the 
person 
knows. 
So 
very 
much 
--not 
the 
stranger 
jumping 
out of the 
bushes, 
which 
we 
know 
is 
true 
for everyone, 
but 96% 
for 
people 
with 
disabilities. 


And 
people 
with 
intellectual/developmental 
disabilities 
are 
less 
likely 
to 
report. So 
when 
they 
live 
in 
a 
congregate 
setting, 
85% 
go 
unreported. So 
they 
live 
in 
like 
a 
group 
home 
or some 
large 
area 
where 
people 
are 
living, 
all residents 
in 
one 
area. 85% 
go 
unreported. And 
they're 
also 
less 
likely to 
lead 
to 
prosecution 
--boy, 
I'm 
having 
trouble 
speaking 
today 
--prosecution 
or 
conviction. 



So 
70% 
of 
serious 
crimes 
against 
people 
without 
disabilities 
are 
prosecuted, 
and 
only 
5% 
of 
serious 
crimes 
against 
people 
with 
disabilities. 


So 
these 
statistics 
are 
so 
alarming, 
and 
I've 
spent 
some 
time 
talking 
to 
parents, 
and 
they're 
very, 
very 
concerned 
about 
this 
issue, 
and 
often 
will 
say 
to 
me, 
"I 
one 
--it's 
not wonder if I wonder if my child 
will be 
abused 
but actually 
when 
my 
child 
will 
be 
abused." 
Parents 
have 
also 
told 
me 
they 
feel 
really 
outraged 
by 
this 
--by 
these 
statistics 
and 
by 
our 
lack 
of 
outrage 
as 
a 
country. 


So 
I 
think 
that 
probably, 
you 
know, 
you're 
listening 
to 
this, 
you're 
very 
committed, 
you're 
concerned 
about 
all 
of 
these 
things. 
There 
are 
lots 
of 
people 
that 
don't 
know 
about 
it 
and 
are 
not 
outraged. 
So 
I'm 
glad 
that 
we're 
all 
here 
talking 
about 
this. 
And 
some 
of 
the 
reasons 
why 
these 
rates 
are 
so 
high 
are 
because 
of 
that 
lack 
of 
sexuality 
education. 
So 
denied 
education 
about 
sexual 
health 
and 
relationships, 
and 
I spoke 
with 
a 
person 
with 
a 
disability 
recently 
who 
said 
that 
she 
was 
part 
of 
the 
mainstream 
health 
class 
in 
high 
school, 
and 
this 
was 
about 
five 
years 
ago, 
and 
when 
the 
sexuality 
started 
she 
was 
moved 
from 
the 
class 
just 
for 
that 
week 
or 
two, 
for 
the 
sexuality 
unit. 
So 
denied 
education. 
Denied 
the 
ability 
to 
make 
decisions 
about 
their 
own 
relationships. 
So 
that 
might 
mean 
that 
staff 
or 
parents 
take 
charge 
and 
don't 
let 
them 
have 
the 
freedom 
and 
autonomy 
to 
make 
decisions. 


Another 
reason 
is 
negative 
messages 
and 
ableist 
messages 
regarding 
sexuality 
that 
are 
given. 
We're 
going 
to 
talk 
a 
little 
bit 
about 
those 
messages 
in 
a 
few 
minutes. 


And 
also 
perceived 
as 
less 
credible 
when 
reporting 
violence. 
So 
similar 
to 
the 
information 
about 
less 
likely 
to 
report, 
also 
less 
likely 
to 
be 
believed 
as 
well. 


So 
those 
are 
some 
of 
the 
reasons 
why 
we 
have 
these 
high 
rates. 


Let's 
talk 
about 
messages 
that 
you 
think 
--these 
could 
be 
verbal 
or 
nonverbal 
messages 
people 
receive 
about 
sexuality. 
If 
you 
could 
write 
those 
in 
the 
chat 
box, 
then 
we 
can 
see 
what 
kind 
of 
messages, 
whether 
you 
have 
a 
disability 
yourself, 
what 
kind 
of 
messages 
do 
you 
get, 
or 
when 
you 
are 
working 
with 
people 
with 
disabilities. 
So 
I'll 
give 
you 
a 
minute 
to 
--so 
one 
person 
wrote 
"no 
sex 
for 
you." 
"Are 
you 
even 
able 
to 
have 
sex?" 
"People 
with 
disabilities 
are 
asexual, 
they 
don't 
have 
the 
capacity 
to 
consent." 
"Not 
seen 
as 
sexual 
beings." 
"Doesn't 
apply 
to 
you." 
"Can't 
understand 
it." 
"You 
couldn't 
fall 
in 
love 
with 
someone." 
Yes, 
lots 
and 
lots. 
I 
don't 
know 
if 
everyone 
can 
see 
all 
of 
these 
coming 
in. "Sex 
has 
nothing 
to 
do 
with 
quality of life." "There's 
an 
increase 
in 
shame 
with 
issues 
around 
sex 
for 
people 
with 
disabilities." 
In 
our 
culture 
in 
general 
there 
is 
a 
lot 
of 
shame 
about 
sexuality, 
but 
we 
have 
this 
other 
level 
of 
having 
a 



disability, 
and 
it 
gives 
more 
shame 
is 
what 
the 
person 
is 
saying. 
"Forced 
birth 
control." 
"Sex 
is 
bad." 
"Not 
real 
people 
with 
real 
feelings." 


Great. 
So, 
yeah, 
lots 
and 
lots 
of 
negative 
messages 
and 
many 
people 
with 
disabilities 
will 
say 
they 
get 
sort 
of 
the 
general 
messages 
about 
sexuality 
that 
are 
--that 
we 
all 
get, 
whether 
you 
have 
a 
disability 
or 
not, 
but 
then 
they 
get 
even 
more 
negative 
ones, 
and 
here's 
some 
that 
people 
with 
disabilities 
have 
said 
that 
they've 
received, 
and 
very 
similar 
to 
what 
you 
have 
written 
here. 
So 
they 
are 
not 
sexual 
beings. 
They 
don't 
like 
sex. 
They 
can't 
have 
sex. 
They 
should 
not 
have 
sex. 
They're 
innocent 
and 
childlike 
and 
need 
protection 
from 
sexuality. 
So 
I'm 
just going 
to 
protect 
you 
from 
it. 
You're 
not 
responsible. 
You 
cannot 
solve 
problems. 
You're 
unable 
to 
make 
good 
decisions 
about 
sexuality. 
You 
always 
make 
mistakes. 
And 
they 
would 
not 
make 
good 
parents 
so 
should 
not 
have 
children. 
Someone 
wrote 
that 
as 
well, 
should 
be 
sterilized. 
Another 
one 
I 
am 
seeing 
down 
below 
is 
they 
will 
become 
rapists. 
Not 
only 
the 
message 
of 
you'll 
probably 
be 
taken 
advantage 
of, 
the 
other 
message 
is 
you 
will 
probably 
take 
advantage 
of 
someone 
else. 


So 
very, 
very 
negative 
messages 
about 
sexuality. 
And 
that 
is 
a 
big 
piece 
of 
how 
we 
feel 
about 
ourselves, 
ourselves 
as 
a 
sexual 
being. 


So 
what 
impact, 
I'm 
going 
to 
have 
you 
do 
this 
chat 
again, 
what 
impact 
do 
you 
think 
these 
messages 
have 
on 
people 
with 
disabilities, 
all 
these 
ones 
we 
just 
went 
through? 
Feel 
like 
they 
don't 
matter. 
There's 
silence. 
Vulnerability. 
Feeling 
worthless. 
Dehumanization. 
Depression 
and 
neglect. 
Fear 
and 
shame. 
Sex 
is 
wrong 
and 
dirty. 
Shame 
and 
stigma. 
Isolation. 
Disconnectedness. 
Just 
kind 
of 
reading 
these 
off 
as 
they 
come 
in. 
Isolation. 
Romantic 
love 
does 
not 
apply. 
Powerless. 
Increased 
risk. 
Feel 
unloved. 
Not 
allowed 
to 
have 
feelings 
excepts 
ones 
their 
caregivers 
allow. 
Fear 
of 
asking 
for 
help 
if 
abuse 
occurs. 
Low 
self-esteem. 
Self-worth. 
Confused. 
Yeah. 


So 
lots 
and 
lots 
of 
impact 
that 
these 
messages 
have, 
and 
someone 
even 
put 
"you 
have 
no 
language 
for 
sexual 
and 
reproductive 
organs." 
So 
that's 
an 
impact. 
You 
don't 
have 
sex 
education. 
You 
can't 
even 
identify 
body 
parts 
and 
know 
how 
they 
work. 
Feel 
unattractive, 
undeserving. 
No 
connection. 
And 
just 
some 
ideas 
that 
I 
have 
which 
many 
have 
been 
mentioned 
already. 
You 
know, 
worried 
and 
fearful. 
A 
lot 
of 
self-advocates 
talk 
about 
being 
so 
afraid 
of 
relationships 
because 
of 
the 
messages 
that 
they 
received. So 
they 
don't even 
want to 
take 
a 
chance 
because 
they've 
been 
given 
all 
these 
messages. 
Feel 
that 
sexual 
feelings 
are 
shameful 
and 
wrong. 
There 
was 
a 
lot 
around 
shame 
as 
an 
impact 
in 
the 
chat 
box. 
People 
stopped 
asking 
questions 
and 
getting 
the 
support 
they 
need. 
People 
kept 



saying 
this 
isn't 
for 
you, 
you 
know, 
you're 
not 
a 
sexual 
person. 
Then 
we 
just 
stop 
asking 
and 
we 
give 
up. 
Stop 
reporting 
abuse 
because 
of 
lack 
of 
support 
could 
be 
an 
impact. 
Loneliness. 
And 
people 
mentioned 
in 
the 
chat 
box 
unconnectedness. 
And 
unhealthy 
sexuality 
and 
increase 
of 
abuse. 


So 
these 
messages 
and 
the 
lack 
of 
sexuality 
education 
put 
people 
at 
risk 
and 
have 
a 
huge 
impact 
on 
their 
self-esteem, 
their 
lives, 
their 
relationships. 
So 
one 
tip 
that 
I 
give 
people 
is 
to 
give 
positive 
supportive 
messages 
about 
sexuality 
and 
healthy 
relationships, 
that 
that's 
something 
you 
can 
do 
really 
easily, 
in 
our 
work, 
in 
our 
lives, 
in 
our 
own 
minds 
give 
positive 
supportive 
messages 
about 
sexuality. 


So 
that's 
the 
impact. 
And 
then 
I wanted 
to 
talk 
a 
little 
bit 
about 
sexual 
self-advocacy. 
Because 
it 
is 
a 
piece 
of 
--you 
know, 
it's 
a 
tool, 
it's 
a 
concept 
for 
all 
of 
us 
to 
think 
about 
in 
working 
with 
people 
with 
disabilities. 
How 
do 
we 
teach 
sexual 
self-advocacy, 
a 
tool 
for 
safety 
and 
autonomy? 


Okay. 
So 
I'm 
just 
looking 
to 
see 
if 
anything 
has 
come 
up. 
Okay. 
Good. 
So 
sexual 
self-advocacy, 
so 
a 
person 
with 
a 
disability 
--actually, 
green 
mountain 
self-advocates 
have 
defined 
sexual 
self-advocacy 
as 
speaking 
up 
for 
yourself 
sexually, 
getting 
information, 
taking 
a 
stand, 
saying 
to 
whomever, 
"This 
is 
my 
choice," 
stating 
your 
sexual 
limits 
and 
desires 
with 
your 
partner, 
respecting 
others' 
limits 
and 
desires, 
starting 
to 
do 
what 
you 
want 
with 
relationships. 
So 
this 
idea 
of sexual self-advocacy 
is 
really 
kind 
of 
an 
interesting 
one 
because 
in 
the 
general 
population 
we 
assume 
that 
someone 
will 
eventually 
be 
in 
a 
sexual 
romantic 
relationship. We 
might disagree 
on 
the 
age 
that that should 
start, 
but 
we 
do 
assume 
that 
that 
will 
happen 
eventually. 
But 
with 
people 
with 
disabilities, 
they 
often 
have 
to 
advocate 
for 
even 
the 
right 
to 
be 
in 
a 
relationship. 
They 
have 
to 
advocate 
for 
privacy. 
They 
have 
to 
advocate 
for 
sexuality 
education. 
So 
there 
is 
more 
to 
advocate 
for around 
sexuality for someone 
with 
a 
disability, 
and 
you 
know, 
we 
hear 
people 
say 
that 
it's 
harder 
to 
be 
a 
sexual 
self-advocate 
than 
to 
be 
a 
self-advocate. 
So 
someone 
with 
a 
disability 
wants 
to 
get 
a 
job, 
or 
wants 
to 
live 
on 
their 
own, 
and 
people 
jump 
right 
in 
and 
help 
them 
and 
work 
at 
these 
goals. 
There's 
no 
hesitation. 
But 
when 
someone 
says 
they 
want 
to 
be 
in 
a 
relationship 
or 
they 
want 
to 
start 
dating, 
you 
start 
to 
get 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] and 
so 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] 
sexual 
self-advocate. 
Because 
people 
get 
really 
nervous 
about 
it. 


So 
sexual 
self-advocacy 
means 
speaking 
up 
for 
relationships, 
privacy, 
sexual 
education, 
but 
also 
within 
a 
relationship, 
how 
do 
you 
communicate 
what's 
okay 
for 
you, 
what 
is 
not 
okay. 
It's 
sort 
of 
twofold. 
The 
need 
for 
sexual 
self-advocacy, 
it insures 
individuals 
with 
disabilities 
have 
the 
tools 
and 
information 
they 
need 
to 



make 
safe 
and 
healthy 
choices. 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] good 
relationships 
and 
bad 
relationships. So 
they 
understand 
about abuse 
and 
when 
things 
are 
unhealthy 
and 
when 
things 
are 
healthy. 
And 
they 
also 
understand 
consent 
and 
we're 
going 
to 
talk 
quite 
a 
bit 
about 
consent 
and 
go 
from 
there. 


So 
how 
are 
we 
doing 
--I keep 
seeing 
some 
messages 
about 
sound. 
Are 
we 
okay? 
Can 
people 
hear 
me 
okay? 


>> 
This 
is 
Sandra, 
Katherine. 
I 
think 
that 
some 
issues 
are 
with 
the 
audio 
and 
people 
are 
having 
to 
log 
back 
in 
and 
some 
people 
are 
having 
to 
call 
in 
over 
the 
phone. 
But 
also, 
Katherine, 
just 
on 
your 
end, 
every 
once 
in 
a 
while 
you 
are 
dropping 
off 
and 
becoming 
a 
little 
bit 
inaudible. 
So 
if 
you 
could 
just 
make 
sure 
you 
are 
keeping 
the 
phone 
close 
to 
your 
mouth 
I 
think 
it 
will 
help 
with 
the 
sound 
coming 
from 
you. 
Some 
of 
it 
is 
the 
system 
but 
there 
is 
a 
little 
bit 
of 
it 
coming 
from 
you. 


>> 
KATHERINE 
McLAUGHLIN: 
Okay. 
Great. 
All 
right. 
So 
hopefully 
this 
will 
get 
better 
for 
everyone. 
So 
we're 
going 
to 
move 
into 
helping 
people 
become 
sexual 
self-advocates. 


So 
we're 
going 
to 
focus 
on 
really 
three 
areas 
today, 
and 
there's 
lots 
of 
areas 
and 
topics 
to 
talk 
about, 
but 
how 
can 
we 
help 
people 
become 
strong 
sexual 
self-advocates? 


So 
the 
first 
piece 
is 
knowing 
about 
human 
sexual 
development 
and 
the 
need 
to 
teach 
healthy 
sexuality 
and 
I'll 
talk 
about 
some 
of 
that, 
and 
we 
have 
already 
talked 
about 
that 
as 
well. 
But 
also 
we're 
going 
to 
discuss 
issues 
of 
consent, 
and 
there's 
two 
pieces 
there, 
giving 
and 
getting 
consent, 
and 
also 
one's 
ability 
to 
consent. 
So 
we'll 
talk 
about 
both 
of 
those. 
And 
then 
I'll 
talk 
about 
a 
few 
tips 
and 
some 
resources 
for 
communicating 
about 
sexuality 
in 
relationships. 


So 
the 
importance 
of 
teaching 
healthy 
sexuality. 
It 
demonstrates 
that 
all 
people 
are 
sexual 
beings, 
not 
just 
those 
who 
are 
non-disabled, 
heterosexual, 
young, 
et 
cetera. 
So 
in 
many 
of 
my 
trainings 
we 
have 
this 
box 
and 
we 
say 
who 
do 
we 
consider 
sexual 
in 
our 
culture 
and 
it's 
heterosexual, 
non-disabled, 
young, 
thin, 
they 
look 
like 
Brad 
Pitt 
and 
Angelina 
Jolie. 
Just 
certain 
people. 
And 
much 
of 
the 
work 
of 
teaching 
healthy 
sexuality 
is 
opening 
up 
that 
box 
and 
those 
who 
are 
outside 
of 
that 
box 
are 
also 
sexual 
beings, 
whether 
they're 
overweight, 
homosexual, 
bisexual, 
have 
a 
disability, 
elderly, 
teenagers, 
all 
people 
are 
sexual 
beings. 


When 
we 
teach 
healthy 
sexuality, 
it 
gives 
positive 
messages, 
which 
we 
talked 
about, 
but 
sometimes 
people 
will 
just 
do 
abuse 
prevention 
for 
people 
with 
disabilities 
because 
there 
are 
such 
high 
rates 
and 
forget 
there 
is 
also 
this 
whole 



other 
piece 
of 
being 
in 
relationship 
and 
being 
--and 
starting 
to 
date 
and 
how 
do 
you 
flirt 
with 
someone, 
and 
so 
sometimes 
the 
messages 
we 
give 
are 
very 
much 
focused 
on 
abuse 
prevention. 
So 
we 
want 
to 
give 
positive 
messages. 
And 
that's 
what 
teaching 
healthy 
sexuality 
does, 
it 
helps 
people 
with 
disabilities 
be 
sexually 
healthy 
in 
relationships 
that 
are 
positive 
and 
enriching. 
So 
what 
is 
a 
positive 
relationship? 
How 
do 
I support my 
friend? 
Also 
includes 
social 
skills 
training. 
So 
how 
are 
you 
part 
of 
a 
community? 
What 
is 
public 
and 
private? 
What 
behaviors 
are 
okay 
in 
public? 
What 
are 
okay 
in 
private? 
And 
it 
also 
reduces 
unplanned 
pregnancy, 
sexually 
transmitted 
infections 
and 
sexual 
abuse. 
One 
thing 
that 
isn't 
listed 
here, 
it also 
prevents 
loneliness 
when 
we 
know 
how 
to 
be 
in 
relationship 
with 
people 
in 
our 
community, 
having 
friendship, 
having 
sexual 
relationship. 
We're 
less 
lonely 
as 
well. 
So 
it's 
so 
important 
to 
have 
healthy 
sexuality 
and 
have 
it be 
sex 
positive, 
inclusive 
of all sexual orientations 
and 
gender identities. So 
that's 
the 
first 
piece 
about 
helping 
people 
be 
strong 
sexual 
self-advocates. 


Now 
we're 
going 
to 
talk 
about 
consent, 
and 
like 
I 
mentioned 
before, 
we're 
going 
to 
talk 
first 
about, 
well, 
what 
is 
consent? 
You 
know, 
how 
do 
you 
get 
consent? 
And 
go 
from 
there. 
So 
in 
order 
to 
be 
a 
sexual 
self-advocate, 
a 
person 
with 
a 
disability 
must 
have 
a 
firm 
understanding 
of 
consent, 
right? 
So, 
knowing 
what 
consent 
is, 
asking 
for 
it, 
giving 
it 
are 
important 
skills 
to 
have 
to 
be 
a 
sexual 
self-advocate. 
And 
another 
thing 
that 
they 
should 
know 
is 
the 
person 
is 
always 
allowed 
to 
say 
yes 
or 
no 
to 
sex 
and 
self-advocates 
need 
to 
know 
they 
have 
a 
choice. 
So 
we 
want 
that 
to 
be 
clear 
and 
it's 
an 
important 
piece 
of 
being 
a 
sexual 
self-advocate. 
And 
there's 
definitions 
of 
consent. 
So 
we 
must 
ask 
people 
before 
we 
engage 
in 
any 
kind 
of 
sexual 
behavior 
with 
someone, 
both 
people 
must 
say 
"yes." 
Sexual 
acts 
should 
feel 
good 
to 
both 
people. 
A 
person 
can 
say 
"no" 
at 
any 
time. 
Giving 
consent 
once 
does 
not 
mean 
the 
answer 
is 
always 
"yes." 
And 
remember, 
if you're 
not sure, 
ask 
a 
person. 


So 
there's 
also 
more 
about 
consent 
where, 
you 
know, 
we 
really 
are 
asking 
for 
two 
things. 
We're 
asking 
for 
someone 
to 
say 
yes, 
but 
we 
also 
want 
to 
make 
sure 
it 
was 
freely 
chosen. 
So 
I 
could 
hold 
a 
gun 
to 
your 
head 
and 
get 
you 
to 
say 
yes, 
but 
that 
wouldn't 
be 
freely 
chosen. 
So 
consent 
involves 
two 
yeses. 
One 
is 
the 
person 
said 
yes, 
and 
the 
other 
is 
that 
it 
was 
freely 
chosen. 
So 
there 
can 
be 
no 
pressure, 
lies, 
force 
or 
threats. 
So 
things 
like, 
if 
you 
don't 
have 
sex 
with 
me, 
I'll 
break 
up 
with 
you, 
if 
you 
don't 
have 
sex 
with 
me, 
I'll 
tell 
everyone 
that 
you 
did, 
I 
love 
you 
and 
will never leave 
you, 
even 
though 
that 
person 
doesn't 
feel 
that 
way, 
they're 
lying 
to 
get 
them 
to 
do 
this, 
or 
holding 
a 
person 
down 
and 
using 
a 
weapon 
to 
make 
them 
have 
sex. 
So 
it's 
twofold. 
You 
need 
to 
get 
two 
yeses, 
and 
I'll 
show 



you 
here. 
First, 
and 
this 
is 
something 
we 
want 
to 
teach 
people 
with 
disabilities, 
did 
the 
person 
say 
yes? 
Yes, 
they 
did. 
Was 
it 
freely 
chosen? 
Yes. 
That 
equals 
consent. 
Did 
the 
person 
say 
yes? 
Yes, 
they 
did. 
Was 
it 
freely 
chosen? 
No. 
Then 
it's 
not consent. And 
did 
the 
person 
say yes, 
no, 
they didn't. 
And 
was 
it 
freely 
chosen? 
No. 
That's 
not 
consent. 
So 
we 
want 
to 
get 
two 
yeses. 
Those 
are 
important for people 
with 
developmental disabilities 
to 
know 
about. One 
important piece 
about that is 
people 
with 
disabilities 
often 
to 
be 
compliant to 
just 
say 
yes 
even 
if 
they 
don't 
want 
to 
and 
go 
along 
with 
it. 
So 
we 
want 
to 
make 
sure 
that 
they 
know 
about 
being 
able 
to 
say 
no 
and 
yes, 
and 
whether 
it's 
freely 
chosen. 


So 
the 
legal 
definition 
of 
consent. 
So 
there's 
no 
one 
definition 
of 
consent. 
Each 
state 
sets 
its 
own 
definition 
and 
its 
laws. 
There 
are 
some 
features 
that 
are 
very 
similar 
to 
most 
of 
the 
state 
laws. 
So 
freely 
giving 
consent. 
So 
very 
similar 
to 
what 
I 
was 
just 
talking 
about. 
Offered 
the 
person 
--offered 
of 
the 
person's 
own 
free 
will 
without 
being 
induced 
by 
fraud, 
coercion, 
without 
violence, 
free 
of 
violence. 
So 
freely 
chosen. 
Laws 
use 
that 
as 
a 
feature 
in 
their 
creation 
of 
the 
laws. And 
then 
the 
capacity to 
consent. Did 
the 
individual have 
the 
capacity, 
the 
legal ability to 
consent? 
So 
those 
are 
questions 
that 
come 
up 
in 
the 
laws. 


So 
just 
a 
few 
other 
things 
and 
then 
I'm 
going 
to 
give 
you 
a 
comparison 
of 
two 
different 
states 
and 
the 
difference 
in 
their 
laws, 
and 
what 
I 
would 
advise 
is 
that 
you 
look 
up 
your 
consent 
laws 
in 
your 
state 
to 
really 
understand 
what 
your 
state 
says. 
So 
language 
in 
statutes 
could 
inadvertently 
categorize 
people 
with 
disabilities 
as 
incapacitated 
or 
mentally 
impaired. 
So 
that's 
language 
that's 
used. 
And 
it's 
often 
used 
when 
talking 
about 
people 
with 
disabilities 
and 
consent. 
I'll 
go 
through 
some 
of 
this 
as 
well. 
Some 
of 
the 
definitions. 
Under 
consent 
based 
statutes, 
when 
a 
person 
is 
considered 
mentally 
impaired, 
it 
is 
deemed 
that 
there 
was 
no 
consent. 
So 
if 
a 
person 
is 
considered 
mentally 
impaired, 
then 
they 
-they're 
actually 
viewed 
as 
not 
being 
able 
to 
consent. 
So 
there 
was 
no 
consent. 
So 
they 
couldn't 
even 
give 
a 
yes. 
But 
are 
people 
with 
disabilities 
actually 
incapacitated 
or mentally impaired 
and 
what's 
the 
criteria? 
This 
is 
the 
issue 
many 
people 
are 
upset 
about 
with 
consent 
laws, 
this 
assumed 
mentally 
impaired, 
that 
just because 
you 
have 
a 
disability 
that you 
are 
mentally 
impaired 
rather than 
assuming 
that 
people 
can 
consent 
and 
then 
we 
need 
to 
look 
at 
those 
who 
can't. 
So 
that's 
--and 
just 
the 
language 
itself 
that 
is 
so 
negative. 
Right? 
Mentally 
impaired. 


The 
issue 
arises 
in 
criminal 
cases, 
too, 
especially 
when 
a 
guardian 
or 
parent 
believes 
there 
was 
sexual 
assault. 
So 
sometimes 
parents 
believe 
there 
is 
a 
sexual 



assault 
and 
then 
that's 
when 
issues 
--you 
know, 
a 
lot 
of 
the 
criminal 
cases 
start, 
because 
people 
are 
worried 
they 
didn't 
consent. 
And 
there's 
so 
many 
messages 
about 
sexuality 
that 
we 
talked 
about, 
but 
also 
one 
is 
that, 
for 
example, 
is 
a 
stereotype 
that 
women 
don't 
want 
to 
be 
sexual, 
so 
many 
times 
when 
someone 
-when 
a 
woman 
is 
sexual, 
we 
wonder 
if 
she 
was 
taken 
advantage 
of. 


So 
just 
to 
tell 
you 
--I'm 
going 
to 
compare 
the 
Tennessee 
laws, and 
I'm 
not 
a 
lawyer, 
so 
I don't have 
all the 
ins 
and 
outs, 
but I have 
sort of a 
general sense 
of 
what 
these 
laws 
are 
telling 
us. 


So 
there 
is 
a 
lack 
of 
consent 
if 
the 
person 
engaged 
in 
a 
sexual 
act 
with 
another 
person 
by 
forcible 
compulsion 
or 
with 
a 
person 
who 
is 
incapable 
of 
consent, 
so 
similar 
to 
what 
we 
were 
saying 
before, 
that 
because 
he 
or 
she 
is 
physically 
helpless, 
mentally 
defective 
or 
mentally 
incapacitated. 
Such 
lovely 
language. 


So 
just 
to 
break 
those 
down. 
So 
mentally 
defective 
means 
that 
a 
person 
suffers 
from 
a 
mental 
disease 
or 
defect 
that 
renders 
the 
person 
incapable 
of 
understanding 
the 
nature 
and 
consequences 
of 
a 
sexual 
act, 
or 
they're 
unaware 
a 
sexual 
act 
is 
occurring. 


So 
many 
times 
people 
will 
be 
put 
under 
this 
in 
the 
law, 
someone 
with 
a 
disability, 
incapable, 
because 
they 
suffer 
from 
a 
mental 
disease 
or 
defect. 


Mentally 
incapacitated 
means 
a 
person 
is 
temporarily 
incapable 
of 
appreciating 
or 
controlling 
the 
person's 
conduct 
as 
a 
result 
of 
the 
influence 
of 
a 
controlled 
or 
intoxicating 
substance. 
Right? 
So 
this 
is 
someone 
who 
is 
not 
able 
to 
consent 
because 
they're 
under 
the 
influence 
of 
alcohol 
or 
drugs. 


And 
then 
physically 
helpless 
means 
that 
a 
person 
is 
unconscious, 
physically 
unable 
to 
communicate, 
a 
lack 
of 
consent 
or 
rendered 
unaware 
that 
a 
sexual 
act 
is 
occurring. So 
these 
are 
some 
of the 
terms 
that are 
used 
in 
the 
Tennessee 
law, 
and 
it's 
saying 
any 
of 
these 
things 
that 
are 
going 
on, 
these 
people 
are 
not 
allowed 
to 
consent. 
Now, 
if 
we 
look 
at 
New 
York, 
and 
maybe 
some 
of 
you 
are 
from 
New 
York, 
there 
is 
a 
state 
--the 
state 
law 
in 
New 
York 
deems 
that 
all 
people 
with 
intellectual and 
developmental 
disabilities 
are 
considered 
nonconsensual. 
So 
if 
you 
have 
a 
developmental 
disability 
you 
are 
not 
able 
to 
consent. 
And 
in 
order 
to 
be 
deemed 
consensual, 
individuals 
have 
to 
pass 
an 
assessment. 
So 
they 
take 
a 
test 
or 
a 
survey. 
I 
just 
saw 
in 
the 
chat box, 
"That's 
terrible" somebody wrote. So 
this 
assessment 
--a 
lot 
of 
it 
is 
on 
sexuality 
information, 
not 
on 
whether 
the 
person 
has 
the 
ability 
to 
make 
their 
own 
decisions. 
And 
we 
don't 
--you 
know, 
of 
course, 
we 
want 
to 
protect 
people, 
but 
lots 
of people 
can 
make 
decisions, 
many 
people 
in 
the 
general 
population 
didn't 
have 
to 
take 
a 
test 
in 
order 
to 
start 
being 



a 
sexual 
person. 
So 
in 
New 
York, 
this 
is 
what 
--it's 
very controversial in 
New 
York. 
Some 
people 
think 
it's 
a 
good 
thing, 
and 
others 
think 
it's 
terrible, 
like 
Grace 
wrote 
in 
the 
chat box. So 
find 
out what your state 
laws 
are 
and 
what that means, 
but I 
think 
what's 
really 
important 
is 
that 
we 
make 
sure 
that 
people 
can 
give 
affirmative 
consent, 
and 
in 
some 
states 
it 
requires 
verbal 
expression. 
So 
what 
about 
somebody 
who 
uses 
American 
Sign 
Language 
--people 
aren't 
always 
--it's 
not 
always 
possible 
for 
someone 
to 
give 
verbal 
consent. 
So 
that's 
another 
piece 
of 
some 
of 
the 
laws. 
So 
we 
also 
want 
to 
talk 
about, 
well, 
how 
can 
someone 
give 
consent, 
verbal 
consent, 
if 
they're 
nonverbal? 
Right? 
So 
positive 
body 
language. 
Leaning 
in. 
Smiling, 
pulling 
you 
closer. 
Sign 
language, 
yes. 
Nodding, 
yes. 
It's 
not 
a 
verbal 
consent 
but 
it's 
giving 
consent. 
And 
negative 
consent 
might 
be 
pulling 
away, 
crying, 
not 
responding 
to 
your 
touch, 
turning 
his 
or 
her 
face 
away, 
arms 
wrapped 
around 
the 
body, 
sign 
language 
no, 
shaking 
head 
no. 
So 
there 
are 
ways 
to 
give 
consent 
that 
aren't 
verbal 
but 
sometimes 
state 
laws 
require 
verbal 
consent. 
So 
finding 
out 
about 
that 
as 
well. 


And 
the 
things 
that 
we 
want 
to 
consider 
is, 
really, 
the 
relationship 
and 
the 
power 
dynamic. 
So 
sometimes 
it 
will 
come 
up 
like 
can 
someone 
without 
a 
disability 
be 
in 
a 
relationship 
with 
someone 
with 
a 
disability? 
And, 
yes, 
they 
can, 
if we're 
treating 
them 
as 
equal partners 
and 
we 
have 
a 
positive 
relationship. Of 
course. 
But 
if 
it's 
a 
service 
provider 
or 
a 
medical 
provider 
or 
a 
person 
of 
authority, 
then 
that's 
a 
different 
power 
--that's 
a 
power 
dynamic 
where 
you 
can't 
be 
in 
a 
relationship 
with 
someone 
with 
a 
disability. And 
the 
other thing 
is 
we 
don't 
want 
to 
place 
the 
burden 
on 
the 
person 
with 
the 
disability 
to 
prove 
that 
they 
have 
the 
capacity 
to 
consent. 
So 
this 
presumption 
of 
competence. 
And 
many 
people 
will 
say 
it's 
similar 
to 
the 
criminal 
justice 
system 
where 
we 
say 
you 
are 
innocent 
until 
proven 
guilty. 
You 
are 
competent 
and 
able 
to 
consent 
until 
proven 
that 
you 
can't. 
So 
what 
we 
really 
want 
is 
this 
presumption 
of 
competence 
rather than 
looking 
at, 
well, 
you 
have 
to 
prove 
that 
you're 
competent 
and 
--the 
message 
we 
want 
to 
get 
out 
there 
is 
that 
all 
people 
are 
competent 
unless 
we 
think 
otherwise 
for 
different 
reasons. 
We 
also 
want 
to 
try 
to 
prevent 
unnecessarily 
invasive 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] so 
getting 
people 
into 
the 
court 
system 
and 
being 
part 
of 
this 
criminal 
justice 
system. 
So 
we 
want 
to 
avoid 
that 
at 
all 
costs. 
And 
I 
think 
--let me 
just take 
a 
quick look at the 
time. 


A 
couple 
of 
other 
things, 
just 
some 
tips 
I 
wanted 
to 
give 
you, 
and 
actually 
I 
think 
maybe 
what 
we 
could 
do 
right now 
is 
get some 
questions 
--if anyone 
has 
any 
questions 
or 
comments 
they 
want 
to 
make, 
and 
I 
tried 
to 
watch 
the 
chat 
box, 
but 
it 
goes 
fast, 
and 
it's 
hard 
to 
catch 
everything, 
but 
does 
anyone 
have 
a 



question 
or 
a 
comment 
before 
we 
move 
into 
tips 
and 
resources? 
So 
did 
the 
Deaf 
and 
hearing 
are 
in 
a 
relationship, 
hearing 
does 
not 
know 
sign 
language 
--I'm 
not 
sure 
if 
this 
is 
a 
question. 
Then 
use 
text 
to 
communicate. 
I 
am 
not 
sure 
if 
people 
are 
talking 
to 
one 
another. 
That 
might 
be 
what 
it 
was. 
They're 
responding 
to 
a 
different 
one. 


Okay. 
So 
does 
a 
text-to-speech 
device 
count 
as 
verbal 
consent? 
Great 
question. 
I 
don't 
know 
the 
answer 
to 
that. 
I 
would 
assume 
it 
did, 
but, 
again, 
I 
don't 
know. 
So 
does 
anyone 
know 
from 
Vera 
whether 
a 
text 
--I lost 
the 
question. 
It 
keeps 
going 
so 
fast. 
Yeah, does 
text-to-speech 
device 
count 
as 
verbal 
consent? 
And 
then 
someone 
said 
depending 
on 
what 
situation 
you 
are 
in. 


>> 
This 
is 
Sandra 
from 
Vera. 
I 
would 
say 
that 
--I'm 
with 
you, I don't 
know 
that 
that 
has 
been 
litigated 
at this 
point. I don't believe 
there 
is 
any case 
law 
out 
there 
at 
this 
point 
that 
would 
have 
made 
a 
definitive 
decision 
about 
that. 


>> 
KATHERINE 
McLAUGHLIN: 
Okay. 
So 
we 
don't 
really 
know. 


I just 
want 
to 
see 
what 
else 
was 
here. 
as 
far 
as 
questions. 
Okay. 
Right. 


If 
the 
law 
says 
they 
cannot 
give 
consent, will they 
actually 
be 
prosecuted? 
I 
keep 
losing 
the 
--all 
right. 
I 
think 
what 
we 
want, 
help 
me 
out 
with 
this, 
have 
peopling 
the 
question 
and 
answer, 
and 
then 
that 
might 
be 
better? 
Because 
the 
chat 
just 
keeps 
going. 
Does 
Vera 
have 
somewhere 
where 
I 
can 
see 
the 
case 
law 
around 
consent, 
or 
do 
you, 
Katherine? 
I 
mean, 
I 
have 
the 
--I have 
some 
around 
New 
Hampshire, 
but 
not 
the 
case 
law. 
I 
could 
definitely 
get 
it 
for 
you. 
And 
I 
have 
some 
--I'm 
in 
New 
Hampshire, 
so 
I 
have 
more 
around 
that. 
So 
between 
myself 
and 
Vera, 
we 
could 
find 
something 
for 
you. 


So 
let's 
--I'm 
going 
to 
go 
over here. 
How 
do 
you 
talk 
to 
students 
about 
the 
laws 
they 
--that 
they 
say 
they 
cannot 
consent 
to 
sex? 
How 
do 
you 
talk 
to 
students? 
Yeah, 
good 
question. 
I 
think 
what 
we 
want 
to 
do 
is 
tell 
people 
what 
the 
laws 
are, 
and 
whether 
they 
have 
a 
disability 
or 
not, 
and 
then 
we, 
you 
know, 
want 
to 
talk 
about 
what 
that 
means. 
I 
mean, 
I 
focus 
more 
on 
students 
that 
are 
in 
my 
class 
and 
they 
are 
participating 
in 
the 
class 
and 
make 
lots 
of 
decisions 
--ah, 
now 
I 
can 
see 
the 
chat 
box 
better. 
So 
I 
think 
what 
we 
want 
to 
do 
is 
--that's 
the 
tricky 
part 
is, 
if 
a 
state 
says 
you 
can't 
consent 
and 
yet 
you 
feel 
that 
someone 
is 
able 
to, 
I 
don't 
think 
that 
people 
--I mean, I think 
what 
might 
happen 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] and 
I think 
what 
we 
struggle 
with 
this 
topic 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] there's 
the 
laws 
and 
then 
--then 
there 
is 
the 
reality, 
and 
people 
with 
disabilities 
consent 
all 
the 
time 
to 
sexual 
relationships, 
and 
so 
how 
do 
we 
manage 
those 
two 
opposing 
things. 
Now, 
even 
someone 
without 
a 
disability 
might 
consent 
to 
sex 
before 
they 
are 
legally 
able 
as 
well. 
So 
--yeah. 
I 
think 
this 
is 
where 
it 
comes 
out 



in 
the 
court systems 
more, 
but really talking 
to 
young 
people 
about what consent 
is 
and 
going 
from 
there. 


If 
a 
state 
law 
says 
that 
people 
--okay. 
What 
if 
a 
state 
law 
says 
people 
can't 
consent, 
people 
with 
disabilities 
can't 
consent? 
Like 
I 
said, 
people 
consent 
all 
the 
time, 
and 
so 
how 
do 
we 
protect 
people 
with 
laws 
but 
also 
give 
them 
the 
right 
to 
be 
a 
sexual 
person. 
That's 
where 
the 
rub 
is. 
That's 
where 
it 
gets 
really 
tricky. 


Okay. 
People 
take 
part 
in 
unsafe 
sexual 
acts 
to 
address 
their 
need 
for 
-this 
is 
somebody's 
comment 
about 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] some 
people 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] 
sexual 
acts 
because 
no 
one 
is 
talking 
to 
them 
about, 
assuming, 
protection 
and 
consent 
and 
end 
up 
being 
in 
unsafe 
situations 
because 
of 
the 
lack 
of 
sexuality 
education. 


Let 
me 
just 
look 
through 
here 
and 
see 
what 
else 
is 
here. 
All 
right, 
legislation 
is 
always 
going 
to 
be 
way behind 
technology 
--there 
is 
always 
a 
sticky 
catch-up 
because 
court 
cases 
take 
years 
to 
make 
it 
through 
the 
system. 
So, 
yeah, 
we 
are 
talking 
about 
a 
system 
that 
takes 
a 
lot 
of 
time 
and 
we 
don't 
have 
all 
the 
answers 
and 
there 
is 
a 
lot 
of 
gray 
area. 
It's 
very 
difficult 
to 
prove 
consent 
is 
any 
capacity, 
typed 
or 
spoken. 
This 
sounds 
so 
discriminatory. 
Yeah, 
that 
people 
don't 
have 
the 
right 
to 
consent 
is 
extremely 
discriminatory, 
if 
that's 
what 
you 
are 
referring 
to. I can 
type 
independently, 
but that is 
a 
great privilege. So 
this 
is 
just 
talking 
about 
people 
having 
the 
right 
to 
consent 
and 
speak 
up 
and 
type, 
text 
using 
a 
text 
device. 


So 
do 
people 
with 
disabilities 
have 
proxy 
to 
obtain 
consent 
for 
sexual 
relationships 
or what would 
legally 
categorize 
consent for those 
people? 
Do 
people 
have 
a 
proxy 
--so 
we 
sort 
of 
talked 
about 
this 
depending 
on 
the 
state, 
like 
New 
York 
you 
have 
to 
pass 
this 
assessment, 
but 
other 
states, 
you're 
going 
--it's 
going 
to 
be 
more 
around 
some 
of 
the 
language 
like 
the 
Tennessee 
laws. 


I think 
that 
might 
be 
all at 
this 
point 
--oh 
--okay. 
Wait. 
There's 
more. 
Hold 
on. 
Are 
there 
specific 
statistics 
of 
sexual 
abuse 
from 
someone 
in 
power 
against 
one 
with 
--with 
an 
intellectual 
disability? 
Are 
there 
any 
statistics 
of 
sexual 
abuse 
--oh, 
so 
someone 
with 
an 
intellectual 
disability 
against 
another 
with 
an 
intellectual 
disability, 
and 
I 
don't 
believe 
there 
are 
--I don't 
know 
of 
any 
statistics 
around 
that. 
I'm 
sure 
it 
happens. 
Right? 
But 
I 
don't 
know 
if 
there 
are 
any 
statistics 
around 
that. 
Great 
question. 
We 
can 
certainly 
look 
into 
that. 


Let 
me 
see 
what 
else 
we 
have 
here. 
How 
can 
a 
person 
with 
a 
disability 
or 
different 
categories 
of 
disabilities 
legally 
consent 
to 
have 
a 
sexual 
relationship 
or 
do 
they 
have 
a 
proxy 
for 
that? 
I 
think 
we 
have 
been 
talking 
about 
that. 


Could 
you 
discuss 
concerns 
around 
power 
dynamics 
besides 
obvious 



situations. 
I 
think 
what 
we 
have 
to 
do 
is 
talk 
more 
about 
what's 
a 
healthy 
relationship 
and 
what's 
an 
unhealthy 
relationship, 
and 
just 
was 
you 
have 
an 
unhealthy 
relationship 
doesn't 
mean 
it's 
abusive. 
But 
it 
could 
get 
healthier. 
So 
I 
think 
just 
talking 
more 
about 
that. 
Is 
there 
respect? 
Do 
you 
have 
choice? 
Or 
does 
your 
partner 
make 
all 
the 
decisions? 
And 
really 
focusing 
on 
the 
relationship 
itself and 
power dynamics. As 
we 
all know, 
and 
I know 
many in 
the 
audience 
are 
from 
domestic 
violence 
agencies, 
you 
know, 
not 
just 
disability, 
they're 
people 
with 
imbalance 
of 
power 
in 
a 
relationship, 
and 
so 
those 
are 
always 
fairly 
tricky 
how 
we're 
going 
to 
talk 
about 
this. 


What 
if 
a 
person 
has 
in 
their 
individual 
support 
plan 
that 
they 
want 
to 
know 
more 
about 
sexuality? 
Should 
that 
be 
honored? 
You 
know, 
it's 
interesting, 
because 
we're 
also 
talking 
about 
guardianship 
laws, 
too. So 
sometimes 
people, 
guardians, 
maybe 
their 
parents 
or 
maybe 
they're 
not 
their 
parents, 
feel 
that 
they 
can 
decide 
whether 
someone 
with 
a 
disability 
can 
attend 
a 
sexuality 
education 
class. 
And, 
really, 
education, 
that's 
not 
a 
place 
where 
guardians 
have 
power, 
and 
oftentimes 
guardians 
think 
they 
have 
more 
power 
than 
they 
actually 
do. 
So 
I 
think 
it 
should 
be 
honored, 
absolutely, 
and 
we 
also 
want 
to 
support 
parents 
in 
talking 
to 
their 
own 
kids 
about 
sexuality 
and 
when 
we 
--sexuality 
education 
needs 
to 
be 
sort 
of 
values 
free. 
What 
I 
mean 
by 
that 
is, 
as 
a 
teacher, 
you 
don't 
want 
to 
share 
your 
values. 
Because 
sometimes 
parents 
don't 
want 
someone 
to 
attend 
the 
class 
because 
they're 
worried 
you're 
going 
to 
tell 
them 
what's 
okay 
and 
what's 
not 
okay. 
So 
we're 
going 
to 
--so 
you 
want 
them 
to 
know 
that 
the 
sexuality 
education 
class 
that's 
available, 
the 
person 
is 
not 
going 
to 
impose 
their 
values. 
They're 
going 
to 
talk 
about 
common 
values, 
like 
respect 
and 
consent 
and 
listening 
to 
a 
partner, 
but 
they're 
not 
going 
to 
say 
whether 
someone 
should 
be 
sexual 
or 
not. 
So 
I 
think 
that 
can 
help 
parents 
when 
they're 
concerned 
about 
sex 
education, 
but 
if 
it's 
in 
somebody's 
support 
plan, 
I 
think 
that 
absolutely 
should 
be 
honored. 


Okay. 
So 
let 
me 
see 
what 
we've 
got 
for 
--okay. 
3:00. 
I'm 
going 
to 
keep 
going 
through 
a 
few 
of 
these 
questions. 
There 
are 
so 
many 
questions 
here. 


[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] guardianship 
or power of 
attorney 
affect 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] in 
regards 
to 
sex? 
My 
understanding 
is 
that guardians 
do 
not have 
the 
power 
to 
decide 
whether 
someone 
can 
consent 
to 
sex 
or 
not. 
But 
depending 
on 
the 
guardianship 
laws 
in 
the 
state 
as 
well, 
there 
may 
be 
some 
--there 
might 
be 
--like 
different 
states 
have 
different 
categories 
and 
they're 
checked 
off 
of 
what 
you 
have 
control 
over. 
So 
maybe 
it's 
finances 
or 
health, 
and 
sometimes 
guardians 
will 
look at the 
health 
and 
feel like, 
well, 
this 
is 
a 
place 
where 
I can 
control or 



intervene 
around 
consent to 
sex. But my understanding 
is 
that a 
guardian 
cannot 
stop 
someone 
from 
consent. 
And 
we 
may 
not 
even 
have 
cases 
that 
have 
gone 
through 
the 
court 
system 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] that 
can 
tell us 
the 
answer to 
that. 
So 
it's, 
again, 
more 
gray 
area. 


Let's 
see. 
How 
do 
you 
prove 
consent, 
is 
it 
verbal 
and 
becomes 
he 
said/she 
said 
situation? 
You 
know, 
that's 
true 
anywhere, 
right, 
when 
it's 
a 
he 
said/she 
said. 
How 
do 
we 
prove 
that 
somebody 
consented? 
And 
I 
just 
talked 
to 
a 
developmental 
disability 
agency 
recently 
and 
this 
is 
the 
exact 
situation 
that's 
going 
on 
right 
now, 
and 
what 
do 
you 
do 
with 
that 
situation? 
And 
that's 
true 
for 
anyone 
without 
a 
disability 
as 
well 
when 
it's 
a 
he 
said/she 
said. 
But 
just 
because 
somebody 
has 
a 
disability 
doesn't 
mean 
they 
shouldn't 
be 
believed. 
Right? 
So 
that 
is 
an 
issue 
are 
we 
not 
assuming 
they're 
credible. 
But 
just 
making 
sure 
we're 
in 
tune 
with 
that and 
making 
sure 
we're 
not assuming 
that someone 
is 
not a 
credible 
source. 


Okay. 
In 
New 
York 
they 
have 
to 
have 
proxy 
--is 
that what you 
are 
saying? 
I'm 
not 
sure 
what 
you 
mean 
when 
you 
say 
"proxy," 
but 
what 
I know 
is 
you 
have 
to 
pass 
this 
test 
to 
be 
deemed 
consensual, 
if 
that 
is 
what 
you 
mean. 


Litigation 
concerning 
facilitated 
communication 
both 
exonerating 
and 
accused 
and 
prosecuting 
those 
that 
they 
said 
they 
had 
consent. 
So 
it 
sounds 
like 
there's 
some 
litigation 
concerning 
facilitated 
communication. 
I 
don't 
know 
about 
that 
specifically. 


What 
about 
people 
who 
need 
communication 
support, 
can 
they 
consent? 
So 
I 
think 
that's 
something 
we 
want 
to 
find 
more 
about. 
Depending 
on 
your 
state 
law, 
does 
it have 
to 
be 
verbal, 
and 
what 
does 
verbal 
mean? 
So 
we'll 
have 
to 
work 
more 
in 
--more 
around 
the 
laws 
in 
changing 
the 
laws 
so 
that 
you 
can 
use 
communication 
support 
to 
consent. 


As 
an 
educator 
can 
I 
get 
trouble 
teaching 
people 
with 
disabilities 
about 
consent 
and 
sexuality? 
Yeah, 
I 
mean, 
unfortunately 
we 
all 
have 
to 
be 
really 
careful, 
right? 
I 
don't 
believe 
you're 
going 
to 
get 
in 
trouble, 
but 
as 
an 
educator 
-a 
special 
educator, 
depending 
on 
the 
school 
system, 
I 
would 
check 
in 
with 
administration 
and 
say, 
I 
think 
that 
we 
need 
to 
teach 
consent 
and 
sexuality 
to 
our 
students 
with 
disabilities 
and, 
you 
know, 
not 
doing 
it 
puts 
them 
at 
risk, 
and 
we 
want 
them 
to 
have 
safe 
and 
autonomous 
sexual 
relationships, 
and 
education 
is 
important. The 
other piece 
to 
pull in 
is 
what are 
your 
state 
laws 
around 
sex 
education? 
And 
oftentimes 
people 
with 
disabilities 
are 
not 
given 
that 
the 
education 
state 
laws 
are 
expecting 
all 
students 
to 
get. 
So 
that's 
another 
thing 
to 
look into, 
what are 
the 
laws 
regarding 
sex 
education 
in 
your state 
and 
is 
there 
a 



requirement for all teenagers 
to 
get sexual and 
reproductive 
health 
education? 
If 
true, 
are 
students 
with 
disabilities 
getting 
that? 
And 
also 
if 
you 
have 
parents 
that 
are 
advocating 
for 
more 
sexuality 
education 
in 
the 
schools, 
that's 
very 
powerful. 
And 
getting 
them 
to 
talk 
to 
administration 
and 
say 
--or 
if 
they 
say, 
yes, 
I'm 
really 
interested 
in 
this, 
that you 
use 
that as 
a 
selling 
point to 
the 
administration. But 
there 
are 
lots 
of 
schools 
that 
are 
teaching 
sexuality 
education 
to 
students 
with 
disabilities. 
But 
like 
I 
said 
earlier, 
then 
there's 
also 
many 
early 
that 
put 
them 
out 
of 
the 
sexuality 
units. 


Proxy 
is 
a 
person 
who 
is 
legally 
authorized 
to 
make 
all 
decisions. 
So 
it's 
similar 
to 
guardian, 
someone 
wrote 
in. 
A 
proxy 
is 
a 
person 
who 
is 
legally 
authorized 
to 
make 
all 
decisions 
for 
a 
person 
with 
a 
disability. 
Yeah. 
So 
I 
think 
someone 
was 
asking 
about 
could 
someone 
else 
give 
permission 
and 
that 
they 
would 
need 
a 
proxy. 
Yeah. 


And 
I'm 
in 
Pennsylvania 
and 
the 
IST 
is 
in 
agreement 
between 
the 
individual 
and 
the 
state 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] provided 
to 
support 
them 
to 
have 
the 
life 
they 
want. 
Would 
that 
be 
some 
type 
of 
consent? 
I'm 
trying 
to 
understand 
that. 
Providers 
-right. 
Okay. So 
--great. 
What's 
the 
life 
that 
they 
want 
to 
have 
and 
how 
are 
we 
supporting 
that? 
And 
would 
that 
be 
some 
sort 
of 
consent 
as 
far 
as 
it's 
this 
--in 
the 
ISP 
there 
is 
this 
agreement 
between 
the 
individual 
and 
state 
saying 
that 
they 
should 
have 
the 
life 
that 
they 
want. 
I 
would 
say 
that 
that 
does 
mean 
that 
they 
can 
consent, 
but 
I 
don't 
know 
that 
everyone 
would 
agree 
with 
that. 


And 
can 
people 
be 
in 
psychiatric 
hospitals 
consent 
or 
are 
they 
all 
considered 
mentally 
impaired? 
Another 
good 
question. 
Right. 
I 
don't 
know. 
I 
have 
work 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] I don't 
really 
know 
the 
answer 
to 
that. 
But 
I 
think 
this 
is 
bringing 
up 
a 
lot 
of 
questions, 
and 
I'm 
sure 
Vera 
will 
take 
some 
of 
these 
as 
next 
steps. 


All 
right. 
So 
let's 
see. 
I'm 
looking 
over 
in 
the 
chat. 
I 
think 
I've 
probably 
covered 
everything. 
I'm 
just 
going 
to 
do 
a 
little 
bit 
more 
around 
--okay. 
So 
someone 
said 
I 
would 
like 
to 
hear 
more 
about 
your 
experience 
that 
sexual 
self-advocates 
and 
co-training. 
How 
do 
you 
recruit, 
train, 
et 
cetera? 
Yeah, 
let 
me 
tell 
you 
a 
little 
of 
that. 


So 
the 
last 
training 
that 
I 
did 
was 
in 
Michigan, 
and 
it 
was 
a 
developmental 
disability 
council 
in 
Michigan. 
They 
brought 
together 
40 
different 
people 
about 
20 
self-advocates 
and 
20 
professionals, 
and 
they 
received 
my 
curriculum, 
and 
we 
did 
two 
days 
of 
training 
around 
what 
is 
--makes 
a 
good 
sexuality 
educator. 
So 
I 
think 
the 
developmental 
disability 
council 
had 
a 
lot 
of 
connections 
with 
self-advocates 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] in 
your state 
might 
be 
a 
self-advocacy 
movement, 



peer 
mentors, 
meaning 
that 
they 
talk 
to 
other 
people 
with 
disabilities 
about 
how 
to 
advocate 
and 
change 
policy. 
So 
there 
was 
already 
kind 
of 
a 
pool 
of 
people 
that 
they 
could 
really 
draw 
from. 
I 
think 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] any 
advocacy 
groups 
in 
your 
state 
would 
be 
a 
great 
way 
to 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] recruit 
and 
train 
people. 
And 
the 
curriculum 
that 
I 
wrote 
is 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] for someone 
with 
a 
disability 
and 
some 
-and 
a 
professional 
to 
team 
teach. 
So 
it's 
well 
scripted 
for 
someone 
with 
a 
disability, 
and 
it 
is 
--there's 
teaching 
tools 
and 
handouts 
that 
can 
be 
used 
and 
reproduced 
for classes. So 
it makes 
it an 
easier 
--easier 
to 
get 
started. 
So 
that's 
how 
I've 
done 
it, 
is 
worked 
with 
the 
state, 
and 
the 
hope 
in 
Michigan 
is 
that 
there 
will 
be 
teams 
all 
around 
the 
state 
that 
can 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] sexuality 
education 
for 
people 
with 
disabilities. 


I'm 
looking 
at 
something 
here. 
It 
says 
as 
a 
sexuality 
educator 
it's 
hard 
to 
convince 
any 
parent 
that 
their 
child 
is 
a 
sexual 
being. 
And 
in 
Massachusetts 
we've 
developed 
guidelines 
for 
rape 
crisis 
centers 
on 
working 
with 
survivors 
who 
have 
I/DD 
and 
includes 
a 
review 
of some 
of the 
laws. That's 
a 
helpful resource 
to 
know 
about, 
and 
it 
is 
hard 
to 
convince 
any 
parent 
--it's 
difficult for us 
to 
think about 
our 
children 
growing 
up 
and 
becoming 
sexual 
beings, 
and 
it's 
hard 
to 
let 
go, 
really, 
right? 
So 
not just people 
without 
disabilities, 
but 
people 
with 
disabilities 
and 
without, 
it's 
hard 
for 
parents 
to 
let 
go. 


It 
looks 
like 
someone 
posted 
the 
guidelines 
that 
were 
just 
referenced 
in 
Massachusetts 
that 
might 
be 
helpful 
for 
people. 


So 
let 
me 
just 
finish 
up 
with 
my 
last 
bit 
around 
tips 
and 
talking 
a 
little 
bit 
more 
here. 


So 
looking 
at 
the 
tips 
and 
resources, 
and 
we 
talked 
about 
giving 
positive 
messages 
already, 
but 
we 
also 
want 
to 
use 
inclusive 
language 
when 
we 
talk 
about 
sexuality. 
So 
we 
want 
to 
say 
"partner" 
versus 
"do 
you 
want 
to 
have 
a 
boyfriend" 
when 
you 
are 
talking 
to 
a 
female. 
We 
also 
--there's 
been 
a 
movement 
recently 
for 
people 
who 
are 
transgender 
around 
being 
more 
accurate 
in 
how 
we 
describe 
body 
parts 
as 
well. 
So, 
for 
example, 
rather 
than 
saying 
a 
man's 
penis, 
we 
say 
a 
person 
with 
a 
penis, 
because 
they 
might 
identify 
as 
female 
or 
male 
or 
trans. 
So 
we're 
really 
trying 
to 
use 
language 
that 
is 
more 
accurate. 
It 
can 
be 
a 
little 
more 
confusing 
for 
people, 
but 
it 
is 
more 
accurate. 
So 
I 
just 
revised 
my 
curriculum 
and 
the 
anatomy 
chapter 
lesson 
and 
did 
all 
of 
this 
around 
a 
person 
with 
female 
sexual 
parts 
and 
a 
person 
with 
male 
sexual 
parts 
as 
a 
way 
to 
be 
more 
inclusive 
of 
those 
who 
have 
female 
sexual 
parts 
but 
feel 
male 
and 
vice 
versa. 
So 
using 
inclusive 
language. 


And 
I 
think 
we 
put 
a 
lot 
of 
pressure 
on 
ourselves 
to 
know 
all 
the 
answers 



about 
sexuality, 
and 
it's 
okay 
not 
to 
know 
everything, 
and 
it's 
okay 
to 
answer 
the 
question 
later. 
So 
similar 
to 
what 
we 
did 
on 
this 
webinar, 
you 
know, 
we 
may 
find 
out 
more 
information 
for you. It's 
okay not to 
know 
everything. It's 
okay to 
feel 
embarrassed. 
You 
know, 
I 
didn't 
ask 
any 
of 
you 
the 
messages 
you 
received 
growing 
up 
about 
sexuality, 
but 
in 
general 
when 
I 
ask 
that 
question 
of 
people 
on 
webinars 
or 
in 
audiences, 
most 
people 
say 
they 
didn't 
get 
any 
messages, 
or 
they 
got 
negative 
messages, 
and 
when 
I 
asked 
a 
room 
of 
100 
people, 
raise 
your 
hand 
if 
you 
feel 
that 
you 
got 
positive 
messages 
about 
sexuality, 
about 
five 
people 
raised 
their 
hand. 
So 
the 
good 
news 
is 
20 
years 
ago 
no 
one 
raised 
their hands. So 
now 
there's 
five 
people 
out 
of 
a 
hundred. 
So 
we 
are 
making 
progress 
but 
change 
is 
slow, 
as 
I'm 
sure 
you 
all 
know. 


Also 
when 
we're 
talking 
about 
they 
will 
these 
sexuality, 
we 
want 
to 
give 
facts 
and 
a 
range 
of 
opinions, 
unless 
you 
are 
the 
parent. 
So, 
parents, 
you 
want 
to 
give 
your 
values 
and 
tell 
your 
child 
what 
you 
think 
about 
relationships 
and 
--but 
as 
a 
professional, 
we 
want 
to 
give 
facts 
and 
you 
can 
say 
some 
people 
think 
this, 
some 
people 
think 
this, 
what 
do 
you 
think? 
And 
give 
it back to 
them. And 
then 
the 
other 
thing 
that's 
really 
getting 
sort 
of 
posted 
from 
different 
resources 
that 
can 
really 
help, 
help 
you 
be 
more 
confident 
around 
this 
topic. 
So 
just 
to 
tell 
you 
about 
some 
of 
the 
things, 
and 
Ashley 
mentioned 
it early on 
as 
well, 
but I have 
this 
curriculum 
that's 
22 
lessons. 
It 
covers 
things 
like 
public 
and 
private 
and 
types 
of 
relationships 
and 
how 
you 
touch 
in 
those 
relationships 
as 
well as 
friendships 
and 
anatomy 
and 
sexual 
health 
and 
relationship 
health 
and 
consent. 
So 
it's 
got 
all 
the 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] and 
what's 
really 
important, too, and 
this 
might 
come 
up 
in 
your 
conversations 
with 
parents 
or 
anyone 
that 
someone 
with 
a 
developmental 
disability 
might 
be 
described 
in 
a 
way 
that 
they 
might 
say, 
well, 
yes, 
they 
are 
20 
years 
old, 
but 
their 
cognitive 
age 
is 
5. 
And 
what 
we 
really 
want 
to 
do 
is 
focus 
on 
the 
biological 
age, 
not 
the 
cognitive 
age. 
So 
how 
you're 
going 
to 
teach 
will 
be 
different 
but 
not 
what 
you 
teach. 
So 
someone 
without 
a 
disability 
that's 
20 
years 
old 
needs 
the 
exact 
same 
information 
as 
someone 
with 
a 
disability 
who 
is 
20 
years 
old. 
How 
you 
teach 
it 
is 
going 
to 
be 
a 
little 
different 
because 
it's 
going 
to 
have 
to 
be 
more 
concrete. 


And 
then 
someone 
just 
said 
can 
you 
tell 
us 
about 
how 
to 
get 
these 
lessons? 
So 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] you 
could 
order the 
curriculum 
-


>> 
Katherine. 
This 
is 
Ashley. 
You 
broke 
up 
when 
you 
were 
giving 
information 
about how 
to 
access 
the 
curriculum. I want to 
make 
sure 
people 
know 
how 
to 
access 
that 
information. 


>> 
KATHERINE 
McLAUGHLIN: 
Sure. 
So 
on 
my 
website 
Elevatustraining.com 



are 
all 
my 
education 
materials 
and 
information 
about 
trainings. 
So 
the 
22-lesson 
curriculum 
can 
be 
purchased 
on 
that 
website. 
So 
you 
can 
go 
on 
there 
and 
find 
out 
about 
that. 
The 
online 
staff 
training 
is 
also 
listed 
there 
if 
that's 
something 
that 
you're 
interested 
in. 
And 
it's 
unlimited 
use. 
So 
if 
an 
agency 
buys 
an 
online 
staff 
training, 
they 
can 
use 
it 
over 
and 
over 
again. 
And 
same 
with 
the 
parent 
workshop. 
The 
staff 
training 
is 
six 
sessions, 
and 
the 
parent 
is 
four 
sessions. 
I 
also 
provide 
live 
trainings 
and 
in 
services. 
So 
sometimes 
I'll 
go 
into 
an 
agency 
and 
do 
an 
in-service 
training, 
but 
I 
also 
want 
to 
share 
with 
you 
on 
this 
last 
page, 
I 
have 
--I 
host 
a 
training 
on 
becoming 
a 
sexuality 
educator 
and 
trainer, 
and 
we 
have 
three 
trainings 
this 
fall, 
the 
one 
in 
Worcester 
Mass 
is 
sold 
out 
at 
this 
point, 
so 
there 
aren't 
any 
more 
spots 
in 
that 
one, 
but 
we 
are 
starting 
a 
waiting 
list. 
And 
then 
we'll 
have 
one 
in 
Atlanta, 
Georgia, 
and 
Denver, 
Colorado, 
and 
this 
training 
is 
--the 
purpose 
of 
it 
is 
so 
that 
people 
can 
do 
this 
training 
and 
they 
leave 
with 
a 
sexuality 
education 
curriculum, 
they 
leave 
with 
a 
staff 
training 
curriculum, 
and 
a 
parent 
-leading 
parent workshop 
curriculum. And 
so 
the 
three 
days 
are 
focused 
on 
being 
a 
good 
sexuality 
educator, 
how 
do 
you 
use 
the 
curriculum 
and 
then 
people 
go 
back 
to 
their 
agencies 
and 
they're 
sort 
of 
the 
new 
sexuality 
educator 
and 
trainer 
for 
the 
agency. 
We've 
had 
four 
trainings 
so 
far. 
So 
we 
have 
about 
140 
people 
that 
have 
been 
trained 
already. 
And 
the 
hope 
down 
the 
road 
would 
be 
that 
we 
might 
do 
something 
more 
of 
a 
train 
the 
trainer 
so 
other 
people 
can 
lead 
these 
three-day 
workshops 
down 
the 
road. 
So 
someone 
wrote, 
will 
these 
trainings 
be 
offered 
in 
New 
York, 
too? 
We 
don't 
have 
any 
plans 
for 
it 
at 
this 
time. 
What 
we're 
willing 
to 
do 
is 
if 
you 
feel 
like, 
I 
can 
get 
my 
people 
together 
in 
New 
York, 
we 
can 
come 
to 
New 
York 
and 
do 
the 
three-day 
training. 
So 
reach 
out 
to 
me, 
email 
me. 
I 
think 
in 
the 
last 
slide 
has 
my 
email 
address, 
kath@elevatustraining.com. 
And 
please 
come 
to 
Anchorage. 
I 
would 
love 
to. 
I've 
never 
been 
to 
Alaska. 
Again, 
if 
you 
feel 
like, 
okay, 
you 
could 
help 
get 
the 
people 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] I would 
be 
happy 
to 
come 
and 
do 
the 
three-day 
training 
and 
provide 
that for your community. 


Okay. 
Anything 
else? 
Any 
last 
questions, 
thoughts? 
Great. 
So 
someone 
said 
they 
are 
going 
to 
do 
their 
best 
to 
try 
to 
get 
people 
together. 
So 
we'll 
talk. 
But 
I 
think 
what 
you 
are 
identifying 
is 
--someone 
just 
asked, 
is 
it evidence-based? 
That's 
a 
great 
question. 
I 
think 
you're 
referring 
to 
the 
curriculum. 
I'm 
assuming, 
but 
that 
may 
not 
be 
right, 
but 
the 
curriculum 
is 
not 
considered 
evidence-based 
at 
this 
time. 
I 
am 
having 
a 
student 
work 
on 
it 
this 
fall, 
and 
my 
understanding 
is 
that 
it's 
actually evidence-informed. So 
there 
--there's 
no 
research 
on 
the 
actual 
curriculum, 
but 
that 
it's 
modeled 
after 
other 
curriculum 
that 
have 
been 
researched. But we 
have 
to 
still do 
the 
process 
and 
prove 
that. So 
it is 
not 



considered 
evidence-based 
at 
this 
time. 


Is 
there 
lessons 
for people 
with 
disabilities? 


All 
the 
lessons 
are 
for 
people 
with 
disabilities. 


It 
says, where 
can 
we 
find 
out 
about 
trainings? 
Elevatustraining.com. 
All 
the 
information 
is 
there 
to 
find 
out 
about. 
And 
you 
can 
email 
me, 
too. 
I'm 
happy 
to 
respond 
to 
you 
through 
email 
if 
you 
have 
more 
questions 
and 
you 
just 
want 
to 
start 
talking 
about 
how 
can 
we 
get 
some 
training 
in 
your 
area. 


Anything 
else? 


Somebody 
asked 
about 
recommending 
online 
resources 
for 
people 
with 
disabilities, 
and 
it's 
interesting, 
the 
office 
of 
autism 
research 
is 
working 
on 
a 
website 
currently, 
and 
it 
should 
be 
out 
in 
the 
next 
month 
or 
so. 
I 
haven't 
heard 
lately, 
but that might be 
a 
really good 
resource 
for people 
with 
disabilities 
when 
that 
eventually 
comes 
out, 
but 
there 
isn't 
a 
lot 
online 
for 
people 
disabilities. 
I 
mean, 
people 
with 
cognitive 
or 
developmental 
disabilities 
there 
isn't 
a 
lot, 
but 
there 
is 
more 
around 
disability, 
and 
one 
particular 
website 
that 
I'm 
aware 
of 
sexualhealth.com 
or 
dot 
org. 
There 
is 
also 
a 
website 
titled 
ComeAsYouAre, 
which 
has 
a 
lot 
of—has 
a 
lot 
of 
resources 
around 
adaptive 
sex 
toys 
and 
that kind 
of 
thing. 
We 
didn't 
even 
talk 
about 
that 
at 
all, 
like, 
you 
know, 
someone 
with 
a 
physical 
disability, what 
kind 
of 
adaptations 
might 
need 
to 
be 
made. 


Somebody 
just 
asked 
if 
there 
an 
email 
list? 
Yeah, 
if 
you 
go 
to 
my 
website 
you 
can 
sign 
up 
for 
an 
email 
list, 
and 
I 
do 
it 
--every 
two 
weeks 
I 
do 
an 
E 
newsletter 
with 
some 
different 
content 
and 
information 
about 
sexuality 
and 
developmental 
disability. 
And 
as 
far 
as 
how 
many 
people 
do 
we 
need 
to 
have 
a 
three-day 
training, 
good 
question. 
We're 
sort 
of 
trying 
to 
sort 
that 
out 
right 
now. 
Most 
of 
the 
trainings 
have 
40 
to 
50 
people, 
but 
we 
could 
probably 
do 
something 
like 
25 
or 30. But get in 
touch 
with 
me 
and 
we 
will talk about what might be 
possible. 


I didn't 
hear you. 
Could 
you 
please 
type 
in 
the 
question 
box? 
It 
would 
be 
great 
to 
gain 
access 
to 
online 
training 
materials 
to 
share 
with 
people 
we 
serve. 
Yeah. 
But, 
again, 
the 
curriculum, 
if 
you 
want 
to 
teach 
classes, 
it 
also 
has 
a 
manual 
on 
how 
to 
set 
up 
a 
group 
and 
what 
makes 
a 
good 
sexuality 
educator. 
So 
a 
lot 
of 
agencies 
will 
just 
buy 
the 
curriculum 
and 
then 
use 
it 
and 
have 
--do 
it 
--do 
sexuality 
education 
class 
in 
their 
agency. 


So 
I 
think 
that's 
--I'm 
just 
looking 
to 
see 
if 
there's 
any 
more 
--someone 
asked 
if 
my 
training 
was 
empirically 
valid. 
So 
one 
thing 
that 
I 
am 
doing 
with 
my 
trainings 
is 
I 
am 
asking 
people 
to 
self-assess 
their 
level 
of 
competence 
before 
the 
training 
and 
then 
after 
the 
training, 
and 
I'm 
going 
to 
also 
follow 
up, 
you 
know, 
six 



months 
later 
and 
see 
where 
they 
rate 
themselves 
as 
well. 
But 
after 
the 
three 
days 
usually 
their 
average 
is 
around 
about 
6.5 
in 
people's 
confidence 
for 
leading 
sexual 
education 
classes, 
leading 
parent 
workshops 
and 
leading 
staff 
training, 
and 
at 
the 
end 
of 
the 
training, 
people 
rate 
themselves 
and 
the 
average 
is 
around 
9 
as 
far 
as 
confidence. 
I'm 
not 
sure 
if 
you 
feel 
that 
is 
valid 
enough 
but 
we're 
definitely 
seeing 
more 
of 
an 
increase. 
And 
also 
with 
the 
three-day 
training, 
I 
do 
a 
certificate 
of 
completion. 
So 
you're 
not 
certified 
as 
a 
sexuality 
educator, 
because 
the 
only 
agency 
that 
does 
that 
is 
AAECT, 
but 
I 
give 
a 
certificate 
of 
completion. 
And 
so 
after 
the 
three 
days 
people 
take 
an 
online 
assessment 
and 
answer 
questions, 
and 
if 
they 
pass, 
they 
get 
a 
certificate 
of 
completion. 
Because 
that's 
one 
of 
the 
[ 
INAUDIBLE 
] people 
--people 
have 
--people 
feel 
that 
they 
don't 
get 
the 
credibility. 
People 
say, 
who 
are 
you 
to 
teach 
sexuality? 
And 
so 
this 
helps 
give 
them 
a 
little 
more 
credibility 
that 
they 
were 
able 
to 
attend 
--it's 
not just a 
certificate 
of 
attendance; 
it 
is 
a 
certificate 
of 
completion. 
So 
they 
passed 
a 
test 
basically 
as 
well. 


I see 
someone 
talking 
about 
the 
center 
for 
human 
development 
and 
Julie 
add 
continue 
sun. 
She 
also 
has 
a 
curriculum 
as 
well, 
friendship 
and 
dating 
curriculum. 
I 
do 
some 
work 
with 
her. 
Another 
thing 
to 
tell 
you 
about 
is 
working 
with 
Julie 
on 
this 
is 
we're 
doing 
these 
sex 
talk 
webinars 
for 
people 
with 
developmental 
disabilities 
and 
I 
can 
send 
you 
information 
on 
that 
as 
well. 
I 
can 
share 
it 
with 
Ashley 
and 
she 
can 
share 
with 
you. 
There 
will 
be 
one 
in 
September. 
The 
last 
one 
was 
in 
June 
and 
we 
talked 
about 
relationships. 
And 
the 
next 
one 
will 
be 
much 
more 
around 
sexual 
acts 
and 
how 
to 
be 
safe 
and 
--so 
we 
will 
--I can 
get 
you 
that 
information 
as 
well. 
And 
we 
have 
myself 
and 
someone 
from 
Georgetown 
who 
does 
a 
lot 
of 
sexuality 
education 
and 
then 
someone 
from 
Green 
Mountain 
Self-advocates. 
He 
is 
a 
self-advocate 
and 
has 
autism 
and 
he 
is 
one 
of 
the 
panel 
for 
the 
sex 
talks. 
So 
I 
will 
Deaf 
--someone 
said 
they 
would 
love 
information 
on 
that. I will pass 
that on 
to 
Ashley and 
I think she 
is 
going 
to 
send 
out 
an 
evaluation 
at 
the 
end 
and 
could 
give 
you 
that 
information 
as 
well 
so 
we 
can 
get 
that 
to 
everyone. 


Whew! 


>> 
Thank 
you 
so 
much, 
Katherine. 
We 
really 
appreciate 
this. 
For 
those 
of 
you 
who 
are 
requesting 
resources 
or 
asked 
a 
question 
that 
Katherine 
was 
not 
able 
to 
get 
to, 
I 
do 
go 
through 
and 
Mike 
sure 
any 
question 
not 
answered 
during 
the 
session 
will 
be 
answered 
via 
email. 
So 
I 
will 
reach 
out 
to 
Katherine 
and 
get 
any 
additional 
questions 
and 
resources 
and 
pass 
them 
on 
to 
you. 
And 
thank 
you 
all 
for 
participating 
in 
today's 
webinar. 
I'm 
going 
to 
really 
quickly 
share 
the 
screen 



for 
you 
all. 
Finally, 
we 
ask 
that 
you 
complete 
a 
brief 
evaluation, 
which 
you 
can 
do 
by 
either 
clicking 
the 
link 
here 
in 
the 
PowerPoint, 
or 
the 
webinar 
survey 
link 
that 
you 
see 
on 
the 
screen 
below 
the 
PowerPoint. 
If 
you 
just 
click 
the 
link 
and 
click 
browse 
to, 
we 
would 
appreciate 
it 
if 
you 
could 
share 
your 
thoughts 
on 
this 
webinar 
so 
we 
can 
continue 
to 
meet 
your 
needs 
in 
future 
webinars. 


For 
those 
of 
you 
have 
interested 
in 
downloading 
a 
transcript 
of 
the 
webinar 
you 
can 
do 
so 
by 
going 
to 
the 
captioning 
pod 
and 
clicking 
the 
button 
that 
says 
"save." 
I 
will 
leave 
the 
webinar 
open 
for 
a 
few 
minutes 
to 
give 
you 
an 
opportunity 
to 
download 
this. 
If 
you 
have 
questions 
or 
concerns, 
please 
feel 
free 
to 
contact 
us 
at 
cvs@vera.org. 
Thanks 
again 
and 
have 
a 
great 
afternoon, 
everyone! 


For 
those 
of 
you 
still 
on 
the 
line, 
other 
link 
that 
we 
have 
is 
a 
really 
great 
video 
that 
highlights 
a 
relationship 
between 
two 
individuals 
that 
have 
Down's 
syndrome 
and 
the 
--sort 
of 
the 
really 
special 
and 
great 
relationship 
that 
they 
had 
and 
talking 
about 
the 
importance 
of 
having 
healthy 
relationships 
for 
people 
with 
disabilities. 
So 
that 
is 
linked 
as 
well. 
Unfortunately 
Katherine 
--we 
were 
unable 
to 
get 
the 
technology 
to 
cooperate. 
But 
please 
feel 
free 
to 
click 
on 
that 
link 
and 
watch 
the 
video. 
That 
will 
also 
be 
linked 
in 
the 
evaluation 
and 
follow-up 
email 
you 
get. 
So, 
again, 
if 
you 
have 
the 
opportunity, 
we 
encourage 
you 
to 
watch 
that 
as 
well. 
Thank 
you, 
Katherine, 
for 
the 
reminder. 


>> 
KATHERINE 
McLAUGHLIN: 
Sure. 
Thanks 
for 
the 
opportunity 
to 
be 
on 
this 
webinar.